Writing for a living...

December 2 – Writing. What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?

There is so much that contributes to my inability to write for myself. The easy answer is exhaustion. I write and edit all day. Yes, this is what I always wanted to do. I did everything in my power to make sure that I was able to write for a living. But writing in my current job exhausts me instead of exalts me. Not that it is difficult—I write the same four stories over and over again—a foodservice operation got renovated, is going green, is raising prices or increasing menu/grab-and-go options. The idea is that since I write about these things all day, it should make me want to take the time to write about things I enjoy even more. Doesn't happen. I get home and the last thing in the world I want to do is write.

Instead I turn on my old friend TV—another large impediment to my writing. Man, I love TV. I'm not ashamed to admit it. Some say we are in a Golden Age of television and I agree in many regards and do my part to support it. I should take my love of TV and take it to this blog. I want to start writing recaps of my shows, like the ones I enjoy reading so much. So why haven't I? Pure laziness? Absolutely. But there’s something else . . .

There is the worry that no one will read it. Terrified that people will and not like it. My pal talked about her fear of writing in her post today and I can completely relate. I fear writing for myself because I care so much. I hate when I write something on my own time that doesn't make me proud, unlike the writing I currently do for a paycheck. I accept that my creative license at work is limited by my publication's voice. My boss constantly tells me to be less "cute/clever/funny/ alliterative" in my writing. It squashes all the pleasure out of writing at work that now I fear my creativity has been stamped out of me at home too. I read stuff I wrote awhile ago and can feel proud that I was able to get a little of myself in there. Now it's tougher to remember what "my" voice is.

How can I remedy this? Well the TV one is easy—I will write during commercials. You thought I'd say I'd turn it off...never! The laziness I'm working on by participating in this blogging-once-a-day business. I’m hoping it makes writing into a habit, like checking my Google Reader. As for the fear, I'm not quite sure I want it to go away. It makes me try . . . try to be better . . . try to be consistent . . . and try harder to write in a way that makes me proud.